First let me say that I anticipate you accord accomplished advice, alike if it is a bit banal at times. I accept a baby problem: Last fall, my penis angled up and to the larboard at an about 90 amount angle. I apperceive from Google that this is not an abnormal problem. And at 59, I am beholden that things are alive as able-bodied as they are. But I fly gliders, and the abatement arrangement is a “Texas catheter” with a cesspool band to alfresco the glider. I accept that the angle on my penis may be the aftereffect of agony acquired by removing the catheter. In your abounding years of ambidextrous with penis problems—I apperceive you are not a urologist, but still—have you run beyond problems of a agnate nature? Is there a way to abolish adhering from the penis that will not account trauma? Gliding division will be starting soon, and I alarming application the aforementioned arrangement if it will account added damage. My accomplice is an amazing woman—70, by the way, and by far the best accomplice I accept anytime had (oh, my brethren, do not attending alone to youth!)—but I alarming added damaging my member.
Hanging Under Nice Glider
First let me say acknowledge you for the able compliment—you abiding apperceive how to adulate a girl—and I’ll try to accumulate my brand excellent-if-pedestrian admonition coming, HUNG. Also, you’re right, I’m not a urologist. But Dr. Keith Newman is. He’s additionally a adolescent of the American College of Surgeons and my go-to guy for dick-related medical questions.
“It is not acceptable that HUNG’s arising arrangement acquired the problem,” said Dr. Newman. “His action sounds like Peyronie’s disease, a possibly autoimmune ache anticipation to be accompanying to microtrauma, admitting some penile fractures may aftereffect in agnate deformity.”
Men with Peyronie’s ache appear bottomward with, well, angled dicks. Sometimes the angle is slight and doesn’t baffle with reasonable penile functions. Sometimes the angle is astringent abundant to accomplish erections aching and action impossible.
“Most sufferers will acknowledgment to aural 10 to 20 percent of their baseline curvature aural two years after intervention,” said Dr. Newman. “Thus, it is advised best to adjourn analysis until such time has elapsed. Ninety degrees is absolutely a big bend, however, and beneath acceptable to boldness spontaneously, but it is still account waiting.”
If your big angle doesn’t boldness spontaneously, HUNG, there are analysis options.
“The alone absolute therapies are Xiaflex injections and surgical repair,” said Dr. Newman. “The above is not accustomed for patients beneath than two years from analysis or with beneath than 35 degrees of curvature. The closing is abounding with added aggravation ante due to scarring so abreast the tip. Both can align the penis, but at a amount of breadth in abounding cases. As for arising alternatives while gliding, I advance the afterward product: freedom.mensliberty.com.”
I’m a 37-year-old male. I’ve been with my wife for 15 years. I apperceive that affection transitions in a abiding relationship, but I’m accepting a adamantine time finishing lately. Yes, I’m on SSRIs—antidepressants—but that has alone affronted the issue. We all apperceive that a lot of bodies who own a vagina adore foreplay to advice the orgasms along. Will foreplay advice bodies who own a penis get to the moment faster? I’m appealing abiding I apperceive the answer, and I ample you’re the one to ask what the best foreplay options are because your animal ability is all-inclusive and you consistently accord with two penises at a time. As addition who pleasures a penis and who has a penis that is pleasured, what is the best alertness to get guys off afore the admittance happens?
Seeking Weapons Of Macho Penile Satisfaction
Foreplay isn’t aloof for vagina-havers, SWOMPS! Penis-havers accept assumption endings all over their bodies—inside ’em, too—and while abounding adolescent men don’t crave abundant in the way of foreplay, earlier men and/or men demography SSRIs generally account from added forms of dispatch both above-mentioned to action and during intercourse. Like tit play. I apperceive some men can’t go there because that tit-play shit—like feelings, musicals, sit-ups, and voting for women—could about-face you gay. But if you’re up for it, SWOMPS, accept the wife comedy with or alike catch your tits, and afresh boost a bung in your ass that stimulates your prostate while additionally canonizing to appoint what’s generally alleged “the better sex organ”: your brainz. Allocution bedraggled to anniversary other! If you’re already accomplished at JV bedraggled talk—telling ’em what you’re about to do (“I’m activity to fuck the bits out of you”), cogent ’em what you’re accomplishing (“I’m fucking the bits out of you”), cogent ’em what you did (“I fucked the bits out of you”)—move on to varsity bedraggled talk: Allocution about your fantasies, alarming adventures you’ve had in the past, things you’d like to try or try afresh with your partner. To get your dick there—to advance accomplished those SSRIs—fire on all cylinders (tits, hole, brain, mouth, and cock) afore and during insertion.
I’m a 32-year-old English guy, and this morning I was diagnosed as HIV-positive. I’m in a bit of a state. I haven’t told anyone, and I bare to get it out. I’m in a long-term, mostly austere relationship, but my admirer is across for assignment at the moment, so I can’t absolutely allocution to him about it. So I’m talking to you.
Diagnosed And Dazed And Confused
I’m so sorry, DADAC. I achievement you accept a acquaintance you can admit in, because you charge a accept to cry on and I can’t accommodate that for you here.
What I can accommodate is some perspective. I’m aloof a little earlier than you—okay, I’m a accomplished lot earlier than you. I came out in the summer of 1981—and two years later, healthy, adolescent gay men started to affect and die. During the 1980s and best of the 1990s, acquirements you were HIV-positive meant you had a year or two to live. Today, a being with HIV is accepted to alive a accustomed activity span—so continued as they accept admission to analysis and they’re demography their meds. And already you’re on meds, DADAC, your viral amount will abatement to ephemeral levels and you won’t be able to canyon HIV on to anyone abroad (undetectable = uninfectious). Arguably, your admirer and your added sex ally are safer now that you apperceive than they were afore you were diagnosed. Because it’s not HIV-positive men on meds who are infecting people, it’s men who aren’t on meds because they don’t apperceive they’re HIV-positive.
I don’t beggarly to abbreviate your distress, DADAC. The account you aloof accustomed is cutting and activity changing. But it’s not as cutting as it was three decades ago, and it doesn’t beggarly your activity is over. I bethink captivation a admirer on the day he was diagnosed as HIV-positive added than 25 years ago, both of us complaining uncontrollably. His analysis meant he was activity to die soon. Yours doesn’t. You accept a lot of time left, and if you get into analysis and booty your meds, DADAC, you will alive a continued and advantageous life, a activity abounding with love, connection, and intimacy. Spend some time activity apologetic for yourself, feel the fuck out of those feelings, and afresh go alive your life—live it for all the guys who didn’t get to bless their 33rd birthdays.
P.S. Don’t delay until your admirer allotment to acquaint him. He needs to get activated appropriate away.
On the Lovecast, Dr. Lori Brotto on asexuals: savagelovecast.com.